Everything

Christ arrives right on time to make this happen. He didn't, and doesn't, wait for us to get ready. He presented himself for this sacrificial death when we were far too weak and rebellious to do anything to get ourselves ready. And even if we hadn't been so weak, we wouldn't have known what to do anyway. We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him... sin didn't, and doesn't, have a chance in competition with the aggressive forgiveness we call grace. When it's sin versus grace, grace wins hands down. All sin can do is threaten us with death, and that's the end of it. Grace, because God is putting everything together again through the Messiah, invites us into life—a life that goes on and on and on, world without end. Romans 5, The Message

Every time I watch this video, I get wrecked. I see myself all throughout it. Beaten down, torn away, losing my vision of my first love. And Him always, always pulling me through. Him always, always taking on whatever comes between us. Him always, always loving me.

There are a lot of fears and insecurities I am facing today. I have been aware of them for a long time, but not really faced them. And now facing them scares me. Doesn't scare me so much just to acknowledge it... I'd already gotten that far before. It more scares me that... I have built this perspective on myself, on my future, on people and relationships... and I have built so much of it on a foundation of fears and flaws and failure. And now, when I already feel like I'm afloat on nothing but a stormy sea; unsure, unpredictable, unsteady... I have to lift my anchor. The fears and flaws and failures that have been my consistency. My faulty belief system about myself that has been the one unchanging aspect of my life for as long as I can remember. To believe that I am what He says about me. To believe that I can do more than survive. To believe I am worth sticking around for. To believe people can see through my intense emotional baggage and find something they love and not run away...
All things I have acknowledged I have a hard time believing... but to take the next step to actually let go, let Him take them away, and believe in His voice to be my consistency instead. Believe in His love to be my anchor. "You calm my storms and You give me rest, You hold me in Your hands, You won't let me fall. You still my heart and You take my breath away, would You take me in, take me deeper now"
This will be my heart's cry. I will trust; He will see me through. And my heart will rejoice.

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